THE ROCKY TOP FLOP

rockyflop2

Most recently the Athletic Dept at Tennessee has been stepping on rakes. It’s 1st through about 12th choice for Head Football coach hasn’t been interested in the job. Hiring, then firing Doug Schiano in the same day didn’t help either. Now the AD is out.

“Head Ball” coaches are just not interested in coaching at Tennessee – which is really odd considering the rabid fanbase and the Football budget outspends Alabama.

The visual? The University of Tennessee has a rock. A rock, at Rocky Top. This rock is located on campus, and on this rock Vols spray-paint all sorts of stuff. Some creative, some not so witty. The rock is shaped weirdly like a face planted  dude with his ass in the air.

 

 

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RED INK

SkipperMcScrooge

JOHN SKIPPER runs ESPN. He’s also running off talent with pink slips right before Christmas. Skipper needs ESPN to stop bleeding red ink, and that hard to do when you have multi-year contract for product people aren’t watching.  His solution is to cut actual talent and leave in place Etch-A-Scetching personalities like Mina Kimes and awful shows like SB6.

Skipper also doesn’t like Clay Travis. Travis is an online flamethrower and professional troll who sings a daily death dirge for ESPN. Travis has had former ESPN personalities on his show and they’ve been told (because they are still under contract) not to appear on his show – thus my cartoon.

 

HERM EDWARDS WANTS TO COACH A FOOTBALL TEAM

HERM EDWARDS seems to know how to pundit. He’s been doing it for a long time at ESPN, and he should stick to what’s he’s good at – not try to return to a profession he gave up a decade ago. Herm Edwards is [apparently] interested in the open head coaching job at Arizona State, and apparently Arizona State is oddly interested in a failed, retired 10 years ex-NFL coach.

Edwards has not coached, at all,  in 10 years. He hasn’t coached college football players in almost 30. Easy math – if he was hired as “Head Ball Coach” at Arizona State, there isn’t one player he’d coach-up who was alive the last time he tried that at the college level.

ASU might as well dig up Vince Lombardi and interview his corpse.

Herm

THE JUNKYARD DOG

I NEVER THOUGHT I’d ever do a cartoon analogizing POTUS as a junkyard dog. Alas Mr. Trump can’t help himself. He barks at everything from his own shadow to people who should mean nothing to him. Trump has the self-control of 4 year old in front of a cookie jar with mom in the next room. He’s incapable of acting like an adult.

Trump has been in a twitter snit directed at LaVar Ball, the huckster father of the Ball trio. Trump wants people to like him, and he wants to be thanked for interceding to get LiAngelo and two UCLA teammates out of China. He got his shorts in a tight when nutmeg LaVar wouldn’t thank him for interceding and then went on a snit.

Who would have dreamed up a POTUS sitting at the Resolute Desk tweeting nasty rants at a jackoff helicopter father? Not me. But alas he does, and did and there it is. A cartoon of Trump as a junkyard dog.

Junkyard Dog

SKIP BAYLESS – AMERICAN SUCCESS STORY

SKIPSKIP BAYLESS is a hero of mine. Oh, not because he’s bright, talented, funny or entertaining or for that matter, because he’s good at his job. He’s none of those things. No it’s because he made it to the top of sports commentary for being just the opposite. Bayless is a professional troll. A nincapoop who made it. A boob who makes millions being a lighting-rod of stupidity.

Bayless isn’t just frequently wrong, he’s almost always wrong. Recently he criticized Carson Wentz for getting “stripped” of the ball during a blow-out win. Expect, Wentz wasn’t stripped-sacked. Wentz wasn’t in the game, his backup was. Skippy doesn’t really pay attention to reality, because reality is boring. Reality requires thoughtful commentary. It’s much easier to be dumb as a post and comment on made up stuff. And Skippy really doesn’t care if he’s wrong, because in 5 minutes he’ll be wrong about something new. In that respect Skippy has the “shame” memory of a goldfish. He’s forgets how dumb he is in 30 seconds and moves on to the next dumb comment.

So, why do I say Bayless is my hero? Because, only in America can a man as dumb as Skippy make it to the top. He’s made a fortune notwithstanding being Skippy, and how great is that. Skippy should inspire millions of idiot, trolls and dolts to reach the top of the mountain. So many boobs should turn to Skippy as an example and say: “If Skippy can do it – well, by golly so can I!”.