HELICOPTER PARENTING

BBBHelo

WHAT IS THE WORST THING about LaVar Ball? It’s not that his carney-barking or hacking overpriced shoes or his twitter arguments with Trump – it’s that he’s a shitty parent.

I don’t know more than what I see in media but he (and his invisible wife) seem to have produced one son (Lonzo) who can play in the NBA and make his own way. LiAngelo seems to be a D-League human who will do and say what his dad tells him to say. Melo is the youngest and seems to be fully developed Duchenozzle. He’s learned from his dad the value of being a prick and now that his pops has pulled out of school and prevented from playing in college, he develop in a socially stunted duchenozzle.

So, off to Lithuania in in the winter for the Balls boys to play organized street-ball with a bunch of 3rd rate Euro slugs who couldn’t playing in the US. Super move LaVar! Your helicopter parenting is catching up to you and your kids and no amount of money will change the fact that you’ve ruined them. One hopes that Lonzo breaks from his father and turns into a decent man.

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2017 HEISMAN to BAKER MAYFIELD

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BAKER MAYFIELD is the most impactful player in college football. He’s also passionate volatile and, a winner. Mayfield was the first walk-on to win the Heisman so it’s little wonder why he has a chip on his shoulder and, on occasion is passion spills over.

During the Kansas v Oklahoma game Mayfield was dissed by the J-Hawks and he turned the favor by grabbing his nut-sack and yelling “fuck you”.

To all the Naysayers – Baker Mayfield salutes you.

THE ROCKY TOP FLOP

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Most recently the Athletic Dept at Tennessee has been stepping on rakes. It’s 1st through about 12th choice for Head Football coach hasn’t been interested in the job. Hiring, then firing Doug Schiano in the same day didn’t help either. Now the AD is out.

“Head Ball” coaches are just not interested in coaching at Tennessee – which is really odd considering the rabid fanbase and the Football budget outspends Alabama.

The visual? The University of Tennessee has a rock. A rock, at Rocky Top. This rock is located on campus, and on this rock Vols spray-paint all sorts of stuff. Some creative, some not so witty. The rock is shaped weirdly like a face planted  dude with his ass in the air.

 

 

RED INK

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JOHN SKIPPER runs ESPN. He’s also running off talent with pink slips right before Christmas. Skipper needs ESPN to stop bleeding red ink, and that hard to do when you have multi-year contract for product people aren’t watching.  His solution is to cut actual talent and leave in place Etch-A-Scetching personalities like Mina Kimes and awful shows like SB6.

Skipper also doesn’t like Clay Travis. Travis is an online flamethrower and professional troll who sings a daily death dirge for ESPN. Travis has had former ESPN personalities on his show and they’ve been told (because they are still under contract) not to appear on his show – thus my cartoon.

 

HERM EDWARDS WANTS TO COACH A FOOTBALL TEAM

HERM EDWARDS seems to know how to pundit. He’s been doing it for a long time at ESPN, and he should stick to what’s he’s good at – not try to return to a profession he gave up a decade ago. Herm Edwards is [apparently] interested in the open head coaching job at Arizona State, and apparently Arizona State is oddly interested in a failed, retired 10 years ex-NFL coach.

Edwards has not coached, at all,  in 10 years. He hasn’t coached college football players in almost 30. Easy math – if he was hired as “Head Ball Coach” at Arizona State, there isn’t one player he’d coach-up who was alive the last time he tried that at the college level.

ASU might as well dig up Vince Lombardi and interview his corpse.

Herm

THE JUNKYARD DOG

I NEVER THOUGHT I’d ever do a cartoon analogizing POTUS as a junkyard dog. Alas Mr. Trump can’t help himself. He barks at everything from his own shadow to people who should mean nothing to him. Trump has the self-control of 4 year old in front of a cookie jar with mom in the next room. He’s incapable of acting like an adult.

Trump has been in a twitter snit directed at LaVar Ball, the huckster father of the Ball trio. Trump wants people to like him, and he wants to be thanked for interceding to get LiAngelo and two UCLA teammates out of China. He got his shorts in a tight when nutmeg LaVar wouldn’t thank him for interceding and then went on a snit.

Who would have dreamed up a POTUS sitting at the Resolute Desk tweeting nasty rants at a jackoff helicopter father? Not me. But alas he does, and did and there it is. A cartoon of Trump as a junkyard dog.

Junkyard Dog